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As Seen on TV: Pajama Jeans

While your Google Reader is filling up fast with photos of London Fashion Week*, I thought I’d share with you something that – well, its just Not Good. With capitals. NOT. GOOD. Its strange how overseas, it seems that “As Seen On TV!” is a good way to promote something. In the UK (at least), As Seen On TV is another way of saying “This product is a bit crap, but you think it will fill a desperate need that you never knew you had until now”. For those of you who remember the original version of ASOS, you’ll probably remember it fondly as a site that sold things tenuously linked to celebrities, and later on, branded crap from those shows. (Even now, they still list things as being “in the style of”, although don’t seem to have a list of celebs you can emulate)

You’re heard me say (read me?) previously about my dislike about things like the Slanket and OnePieces which I dislike because they seem to have become cool and acceptable to wear out in public.

I’m not sure which came first, this ad from 30 Rock, or the actual product. I’m secretly hoping the 30 Rock ad came first to be honest.

So. Pajama Jeans. Firstly, I can’t quite get my head around “pajama”. Its “pyjama“, America. Glad we got that out the way. These jeans are marketed as “stylish, sexy jeans” whilst being “soft, comfy pyjama bottoms”. “Perfect for travel, exercise, shopping and more!” , they’re basically lounge pants that are made out of something that looks like denim, and has all the extra embellishments that you expect on a pair of jeans.

But – why? Aren’t these basically jeggings, but more styled towards your mum? Why would you want to go out in something you’ve slept in (I’ve never quite understood those girls at the University who wander around the Triangle in their Jack Wills pyjama bottoms and their Uggs)

Whats next, infomercial makers? Commode beds? (Why bother getting out of bed to go to the bathroom?) A house thats decorated and furnished with duvets everywhere? (Your whole house is a bed)

If I see any of these ideas on an infomercial now, I may hurt someone.

* I wish I had been able to go to London Fashion Week, but didn’t really think about it until people on Twitter started discussing press pass problems the night before! Perhaps next time I’ll get myself organised?

Sky Mall…Amaze

The one good thing about our flight back to the UK on Christmas Eve was Sky Mall. This fat magazine was the only thing that made me laugh on that flight (besides Despicable Me, but I’d already seen that on the way out to San Francisco. Still cute.)

Why was I so excited by this? If you’ve seen my previous posts about JML and Betterware, you’ll know I’ve got a bit of a thing for useless crap in magazines for home shopping. I’ve only picked out a few here, but I pretty much want everything. EVERYTHING.

Hey, remember when it was all icey and I didn’t fall over once? (I’m quite proud of that actually, considering I fell last year whilst wearing my big grippy wellies and couldn’t work at Christmas) I wish it was because I had used the “No Slip Ice Carpet”. You get two in the pack, so you could just keep moving the one you’re not walking on infront of you and never fall! Not practical you say? Well why not just get someone to carry you everywhere instead.

This one does actually work. I was watching “The View” (no shame) who had a section on about products advertised as being seen on TV. I was glued to the screen. This Touchless Paper Tower Holder is one for the germophobes. Perhaps those ones who are buying that touchless soap dispenser thats being advertised on TV at the moment? (“OMG THERE ARE GERMS ON THE DISPENSER!” Well, yeah, but you’re going to wash your hands anyway?)

Anyway. You wave your hand in one bit to dispense the paper towel, then in the other bit to cut it off, and then you punch it because you didn’t catch the paper towel in time and now its on the side and OMG GERMS GEEEEEEERMMMMMMMS

Need to take the dog in the car? Why not buy this pet seat for $99.95? (I’ve never seen Star Wars, but it reminds me of something that should be in it. Those big tall robots that they shoot things from? Yeah, those.)

I have to admit, there are some things that seem ridiculous, and then you get distracted by the cute little puppy on the sofa and want to order one. The PupSTEP Plus (which implies there were previous versions?) is to help your dog up onto the sofa or bed, instead of them trying to jump up, failing, and falling off. You’re not supposed to laugh when the dog falls off the bed you know.

This…this is just creepy. The pillows might be really comfortable, but why is the woman in a lace-y négligée?  Why is she holding a rose? Why have some of the petals fallen off? These questions will never be answered sadly.

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